Category Mental Wellness

I was never any good at self-care. I was a typical teenager who ate and drank whatever and skimped on sleep. Soon after I was a young mother putting her kids first. That continued about 14 years until about four years ago when things had to change. At around the same time my depression and anxiety got worse and I started suffering from inflammatory arthritis and fibromyalgia. Self care had to become my priority. So how did I figure out what I needed? Mostly I just started with the basics.

Hydration

I’ve always tried to keep my hydration at least at a bare minimum. When it gets too low I get a very bad headaches. Now, I’ve been diagnosed with low blood volume and dysautonomia which require me to hydrate more than the typical 8 cups a day. For most people though, drinking until your pee is light yellow is plenty. This may be more or less than 8 cups. The liquid in food helps too, so if you struggle to drink enough, remember that high water fruits and soups can help.

Eating

If I go too long without food, my blood sugar dips and my depression takes hold. I need to eat every 3-4 hours usually. Not everyone needs to eat as often, but be sure you eat regularly for your body. Don’t skip meals, and snack if you need it. Food is fuel, and your body requires plenty.

I’ve also learned what type of foods make me feel better and what doesn’t. I know I need the right mix of protein and carbs to feel good. Other people feel better with their own mix. Whatever kind of foods that make you feel best is your right way to eat.

Sleep enough

This one is still hard for me. I need plenty of sleep to help manage multiple conditions. I’m also a night owl, and those two don’t always mesh well. I try to make it a priority to get to bed at a reasonable hour most of the time. I’m lucky enough to be able to nap on the days I need it. Sleep is important, so I don’t let myself feel guilty if I need more.

Find out how much sleep you need and make it a priority. Take a look here and see if you can improve your sleep hygiene any. A longer and deeper sleep will be better for you.

Quiet time by myself

I’m married with four kids; quiet time is hard to come by, and it’s even rarer to get it by myself. Not everyone finds this necessary, but as an introvert, I find it vital. My anxiety goes up if I don’t get enough alone time. If I can get even 10-30 minutes alone in my room, it helps a ton. The rare days that I can get an hour or more, I make sure to take it, no guilt involved. The wasn’t always the case, but I’m a better person all around if I get my alone time.

Past the common self-care basics

Like my quiet time, not everyone’s necessities are the same. Sit down and think about what makes you function best. What makes you feel off if it is left out? That is how I figured out I need to be sure to shower every other day. I’ve learned that I’m likely to want to skip a shower when my depression is acting up. As part of my self-care when it comes to depression, I make sure I don’t let myself skip a shower if at all possible. If I find myself dreading shower time, I know I need to get one anyway and then do some extra self-care to help fight the depression.

Once you have your basics figured out and are able to take care of them regularly, then you can expand and add more into your self-care routines. Start small though so you don’t get overwhelmed and burned out right away.

If you have any questions or requests for more on self-care and working out your routines, leave a comment or feel free to email me!

I don’t know about you, but I’m always looking for some great stuff to share online. Just for you, here are some great body positive quotes all ready for you to share on Pinterest, Twitter, etc.

I hope you enjoy these. There are a lot more on my Body Love | Body Positivity board over on Pinterest if you are interested.

I’ve also compiled a great list of body positive accounts to follow on social media. If you’d like some more sources for great body positive stuff to share, just sign up and I’ll send it to you.

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Body positivity can be extra tough when you are a spoonie. When your body doesn’t cooperate and you have to fight it all the time, it can be hard to believe that “all bodies are good bodies” or “there’s no wrong way to have a body”. In fact, for some of us it isn’t even true that our bodies are doing all they can to keep us alive! It’s pretty hard to be positive toward something actively trying to kill you.

So, how do you stay body positive as a spoonie? For one, it helps to refocus yourself on what you can do rather than what your body can’t do. Whatever limits you may have, there is still a list you can make of what is possible. Make that list, and see what you can do to add to it. Learn something new, take up a fun hobby, expand that list any way you can. As you see the list grow, it will help you find appreciation for what your body is capable of still.

Being self-conscious about weight is a common thing for people with chronic illnesses or mental health issues. People can’t control their weight the way they think they can. (link link)  Spoonies have even less control over it. Between illness symptoms, physical limits, and medicine side effects, weight gain and loss is pretty well out of our hands. Even eating “perfectly” (whatever that may be) and exercising all the time won’t give guaranteed results, so just do what you can to care for yourself, and then let the numbers go. There is no perfect weight, and your body has other concerns anyway. Stressing out by worrying about your weight is more harmful than just letting your body find its natural set point given what you are doing.

We are all told that we should get more exercise. Movement can help our bodies to feel better and help us to feel better about our bodies. There are many reasons a typical exercise routine isn’t reasonable for a spoonie. Some have conditions making them exercise intolerant (link, link), some have injuries or limitations for other reasons. There is usually some way to find movement you can enjoy though. I miss dancing. My P.O.T.S. doesn’t allow it without me getting very winded and light-headed now. So, I’ve adjusted my dancing to less movement or chair moves. There are many resources out there depending on your limits. A physical therapist can help you work something out too.

Some days are harder to me to stay body positive, when I focus on things I can’t do anymore. When finding new things to do isn’t enough, sometimes I rethink new ways to do what I’ve lost. Cooking is much harder for me now that I can’t stand as long. I really miss it sometimes, so now, on my good days, we have a chair in the kitchen I can sit on as I cook. I can’t garden like I used to, so we went smaller and have a few container plants now. Many things can be rethought and adjusted like that.

Just like most things for spoonies, body positivity is possible with adjustments. Do you have other challenges to body positivity you would like to see discussed? Please share in the comments!

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People tend to jump to a lot of conclusions when it comes to body acceptance or body positivity. This leads to some common myths. I’ve chosen five of them to discuss here.

1) Body acceptance is only for women.

Not true! Body acceptance is for everyone on the gender spectrum. Women tend to be the focus, because the pressure on them is more obvious. Even so, other people on the gender spectrum find themselves under pressure to conform to certain standards also. There is quite the lack of representation for them in the body acceptance movement though. I will be attempting to be inclusive, but will likely tend to lean toward addressing women and femmes since that is my perspective.

I’ve searched for some sources of info and support from other views for you:

This is a wonderful article with links to good sources.

Body Positivity For The Modern Man – Tumblr

Another great article with links

The Good Men Project has a host of articles in their archive

There is a very noticeable lack of gender neutral body positivity sources. After searching for some time, I think your best bet is to search Tumblr and/or Pinterest for “gender neutral body positivity” or something similar (without the quotation marks). I will be keeping an eye out for any good links, and will be sure to update with them as I find them.

2) Accepting your body, as it is right now, means you are lazy.

Not at all! Many people think those who love body acceptance do so as an excuse to not take care of themselves, but that is not the case. Body acceptance encourages you to cultivate love for yourself and your body, and show that love by taking care of yourself. Showing yourself love includes eating food that you enjoy and makes you feel well, staying hydrated, and moving your body in ways that are enjoyable and make you feel good.

You don’t do these things with any intent to change your body, only to care for it. There doesn’t need to be any guilt over how you actually care for yourself either. Your self-care is always up to you. There is much more to this idea, but that isn’t the focus of this post. If you are interested, you will want to look into Intuitive Eating or mindful eating. If done without a dieting mindset, intuitive eating and/or mindfulness can be a wonderfully body positive way to approach food and self-care.

3) Body acceptance is only about appearance.

Absolutely not. While there is a good amount of focus on all body shapes being acceptable, that is not the only important part. We also need to be able to see what our bodies are capable of doing. Many times people are able to start by appreciating how their bodies function, even when they can’t appreciate and accept their bodies otherwise. Appreciating the strength of your legs, how your arms embrace your loved ones, how your ribs protect your organs, all these things are part of body acceptance.

4) Body acceptance can be found overnight.

I honestly laugh at this one. I feel I can safely say no one ever has. We are conditioned to hate our bodies. That message comes at us from all sides, everyday, and a single article or decision won’t overwrite it.

Being body positive, or even just neutral toward your body, takes making a decision each day, and helping your brain rewire itself in how it thinks. Don’t feel like you’ve failed if you are still struggling after a few weeks. As long as you are working toward accepting of your body, you haven’t failed.

Which brings us to our final myth.

5) Once you find body acceptance, you will never struggle again. (Or you will love your body at all times.)

Even the biggest names in body positivity struggle some days. No matter how clearly you are aware of the lies in the media, these messages have still made a deep impression. This takes a long time to counter, and we are still getting ongoing negative messages, even if we take steps to adjust our “media diet”. (Media diet = what we see each day).

Of course this will lead to days where you struggle no matter how well you’ve been doing. Everybody does. But you will have tools and knowledge to help you through those days.

credit to glasmond glasmond.tumblr.stfi.re

Something that helps me on rough days is listening to music. I made up a playlist on YouTube full of great songs that encourage body positivity and self-love. This play list is especially for my readers, and you can only see it if you have the link!

I feel strongly that everyone deserves to have positive feeling toward their body. Hopefully this post helps alleviate some of the reservations you may be having, or give you answers for anyone in your life questioning your choices. Please feel free to email me at leighbryant@flawedmessylife.com with any other questions or concerns you may be having.

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I’ve previously been covering self-acceptance from a very general direction. I want to focus in a little more now. Personally, I have found self-acceptance extra hard due to my chronic illnesses and mental illnesses. It only makes sense that other people have the same problems, so I want to share my thoughts and solutions.

Accepting Limits

One struggle I have is accepting my limits. Whether you compare yourself to what society expects, or to what you could do “before”, it is hard to accept that you can’t just do whatever you “set your mind to”. Before I got sick, I knew that if I decided I was going to do something, it was going to happen. Now I find myself limited by pain and fatigue; if not by depression and anxiety.

I have found it important to accept that these things will happen. It isn’t my fault, and there is no reason for, or benefit to, me to blame myself. Just like the weather can mess with your outdoor plans, my illnesses and mental health can interrupt my daily plans. In accepting this, I can “go with the flow” more and not simply give up.

Self-Worth

I used to base my worth on what I could do. My grades, my work, my housework, my caring for the kids, etc., all affected my self-esteem. Then I couldn’t do any of it. Brain fog took my “smarts”, and pain and fatigue took my ability to do housework and mother the way I had been. Anxiety never allowed me to work outside of the house for very long. I was left with nothing and felt I was worthless. My husband and kids showed me I was wrong.

They showed me, but this is true even without them. I am worthy, just by being me. The fact that I exist makes me worthy and valuable. This applies to everyone! You too are valuable and worthy just by existing. You don’t need to earn the right to like yourself.

Taking a Second Look at Limits

So, if we are worthy, just by being alive, our limits don’t take anything away from our value. Physical limits are just a line drawn by our body telling us where we need to stop. Respecting those limits are a part of self-care. Rather than fight them and suffering the consequences, most of the time we need to listen to our bodies.

Now, that isn’t to say never push the limits. Some things we may find “worth it”. An occasional special outing with friends or family can be worth feeling worse for a week or two. Repeatedly pushing ourselves will only worsen our health long-term though. You deserve to be treated better than that.

Our ideal may be being able to do everything for everyone each time, and then we feel guilt, anger, failure, etc when we can’t do it. Changing our outlook and seeing it as a way our loved ones can be there for us is helpful. We have a different situation that does not lead to the “typical” expectations. It is fine to expect a change from others, rather than them expect the same or “normal” from us.

Boundaries

This is where boundaries come in handy. Boundaries show others how to treat us. They are a line drawn in the sand. By setting boundaries, we let others know who we are, what we allow, and what is not tolerated.

Chronically ill people and those with mental health issues may have to be extra tough when it comes to boundaries. Healthy people do not always understand our limits and may forcefully push us to surpass them. We must be stubborn at enforcing those boundaries to care for ourselves. People in our life must understand that we mean business, and crossing our boundaries is not okay. They are just as valid as anyone else’s. So many times, people think that just because they don’t understand our various struggles, the struggles are not legitimate when that is the furthest thing from the truth.

Boundaries can be hard to set. If you need some help figuring out which ones to set, and how to do so, I prepared a free “Setting Boundaries Workbook” for you to download.

It is not your responsibility to convince anyone to respect your boundaries. You set the boundary, it is their place to accept it. Be firm, and your loved ones will catch on.

Rethinking Goals and Dreams

The last way I want to talk about limits has to do with goals and dreams. Having a chronic or mental illness can affect what dreams and goals are possible. That doesn’t mean you should give up on them though. you have a few possibilities. First it is possible that you can find a way to use modifications to make it happen. For instance, someone who wants to be an author, but loses the ability to type, can use voice recognition software to write still. If your dream job seems un-achievable, perhaps there is still something in the same or similar field that you can do.

I didn’t think there was any career available for me. Between high pain days, bad fatigue, and my depression or anxiety acting up, I’m not exactly the epitome of a reliable employee. This limits job/career choices quite a lot. Now, I didn’t have any certain job in mind to begin with. In fact, I chose to not go to college (and use my scholarship), because I didn’t have any goal in mind. Nothing has ever grabbed my attention.

After being diagnosed, it didn’t seem likely I would ever be employable. Well, maybe I’m not, but I’ve found a way to employ myself. Being a blogger allows me to work within my limits, and it is a way for me to help people, which I’ve always felt a pull toward. I share this personal bit to show how limits don’t have to limit you, but can actually open up previously unseen chances. To see how I work with my limits as a blogger, check out my monthly series, Confessions of a Chronically Ill Blogger.

There are a variety of ways that someone with either a chronic illness or mental health issues will find their journey to self-acceptance a different challenge than a healthy person. I’m going to stop here, but I’ll address other points soon.

Are there any particular concerns you would like me to write about? Let me know in the comments! You can email me anytime also at leighbryant@flawedmessylife.com .

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It’s only one of many obstacles to body positivity.

We are not born critical of our bodies. It takes years of outside exposure to change this, and unfortunately some are influenced much earlier than others. Where does this influence come from? Quite a few places actually, but I’m going to focus on three here.

The Media

The media is a huge influence on all of us. Everyday we are exposed to the media in some form. TV, magazines, billboards, the internet: we are bound to see one, if not all of these each day. With that exposure comes lots of “perfect” bodies; bodies that are all very similar, with little diversity.

When a person is only exposed to one type or form of something, anything else seems odd. So we only see tall, thin/muscled bodies, and then compare ourselves to that false norm. In reality, there is no “normal” body. Humans are vastly varied creatures, and that is really the beauty of us. If we take measures to fill our views with a variety of figures, our own is not a shock, but another added to the mix.

I accomplished this by tweaking the accounts I follow online. Most of my social media time is spent on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest. I’m also on Twitter, but don’t see as many photos there. My searches focused on accounts that show people with non-mainstream bodies. Plus-sized models, body positive accounts, and key words like: curvy, body love, thick, and “all bodies are good bodies”, are good searches to start with.

Click below and I’ll send you a list of some of my favorite accounts to follow. I have done the work for you, and you get a list full of great body positive accounts! You will also be added to my mailing list to be notified about new posts, if you aren’t already.

Hyperfocus

With the expectation of certain body types, we start to narrow our focus to particular body parts. Standing in front of the mirror, we laser down on to the perceived faults of each individual bit. Focusing on one part ends up giving us the same effect as repeating a word over and over. We have all done it. If you repeat the same word for long enough, soon it just doesn’t seem like a real word anymore. You are not a butt, a set of thighs, or upper arms though. We exist as whole beings, and when we take our whole body into account we can fully appreciate the beauty that is present. There truly is beauty in every body, and when you view a variety of bodies daily you start to see that.

How Clothes Are Sized

The final of the three obstacles to body positivity I want to talk about today is clothing sizing, or more specifically, the inconsistency of sizes among brands. I’m pretty sure everyone is aware of this problem. If not, it is a rare thing to find clothes in different brands that actually fit the same in the same size. A size 10 in one brand is like an eight in another and 12 in yet another. Now, while this is a wide-spread problem, few people put together that it is an issue with the clothes and not our bodies. When you go into the dressing room, and try on some clothes, if they don’t fit, simply try on something else. Don’t worry about the number on the tag. Just find something that fits. You can use sizes as a general idea of where to start, but that’s all they are good for. If the clothes fit, and make you feel good, that is all that matters; not the number on a tag.

We have many other influences in our life that make body positivity a challenge, but I just wanted to start with these three. The good news is that we can counteract the influence, and make a change for ourselves. I hope my suggestions here can help you start making that change, and help you remove your own obstacles to body positivity. Please feel free to share you experiences in the comments, or come over to the Facebook page and join us there!

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A popular “buzzword” lately has been “body positivity”. Not everyone feels ready to have positive thoughts toward their body. In that case, it may be easier to try for body acceptance.

What is body acceptance?

Simply put, body acceptance is just accepting your body as it is with no judgement. It is a step toward body positivity and loving yourself without requiring any change. Another way to look at it is body neutrality. This article covers it well. Just not hating their body can be a huge step for some people.

I’ve talked before about acceptance. Self-acceptance is recognizing and accepting all parts of yourself with no judgement. You can read more here and here. Body acceptance is similar. It is being aware of your body with no judgement. It’s seeing your body as neither good nor bad, but simply a body. If you aren’t ready yet to jump into body positivity, acceptance is a wonderful place to start.

Why body acceptance?

Why be accepting of your body? Well, basically, you are living in the body you have right now, and it does you no good to hate on it. Even if you are sure that, no matter what, you want to change something about your body, you are still living in this body currently, and being negative toward yourself will help nothing. Real change can only come from a place of love, and that is what body acceptance (and body positivity) can give you.

No matter what you may find to be flaws with your body, it is important to find peace with it now as it is. Your body doesn’t have to earn your respect and care. It deserves to be treated well just as it is. It is taking care of you daily, the best it can.  You can return the favor by keeping up with your self-care and being gentle with yourself.

How to start working on it.

There are a few exercises you can use to work on your body acceptance. One of the simplest, though not the easiest, is to spend time each day in front of a mirror (naked if possible). Find at least one thing nice to say about your body each time. If you find yourself having negative thoughts about your body use my method of Beating Negative Thoughts to interrupt yourself, and start turning them around. The goal may be body positivity, but it is fine to shoot for neutrality or acceptance at first.

Now make a list of things you like about yourself that have nothing to do with your body. Shoot for 5-10 to start. It helps to remind yourself how much more there is to you other than your body. You have a lot to offer the world, and you should be proud of that.

Another helpful activity is to start a body gratitude journal. Spend time each day writing down things about your body you can be grateful about. Perhaps it is the way your legs allow you to go on walks, or the way your hands help you to do your hobbies. Maybe you are grateful for the hugs your arms can give, or the great food you get to taste with your mouth. Before long you will have an amazing list to read back though, and see all your body does for you.

If you would like some more ideas, Buzz Feed has a nice list of activities suggested by readers here.

Body acceptance is not an instant thing. There isn’t a quick fix. It is very worth working on though, and I hope you will be willing to take steps in that direction. Everyone deserves to be comfortable in their body.

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Sometimes it’s fun to have a spa day at home. You get to pamper yourself in the comfort of your own space. It may be the introvert in me that prefers that, I’m not sure. Anyway, when you plan a spa day, you either make sure you have stocked up on your favorite products, or plan to make some yourself.

Personally, I enjoy making them myself if it is cheap and easy to do. I have a Pinterest board filled with DIY recipes that are, for the most part, simple and use ingredients you can find at your local store.  My daughter and I tried five recipes to share with you.

The Recipes

DIY Exfoliating Honey Sugar Scrub

We found the optional olive oil in this recipe didn’t mix in well, so we recommend leaving it out. It did a great job exfoliating in the shower, and my daughter gave it two thumbs up. She chose lavender E.O. to add to it, but there are a few to choose from at Walmart, Walgreens, etc.

Raspberry Lemonade Sugar Lip Scrub

I couldn’t find raspberry lemonade, so we used pink lemonade. This turned out very sour, so I wonder if you are meant to use the “sugar added” type. According to C, this DIY version works even better than my store bought lip scrubs. She gives it two big thumbs up, so I plan on figuring out how to lessen the pucker level.

Oatmeal Coconut Cookie Scrub

Unrefined coconut oil gives you the coconut scent, but you can go with the refined type if you would rather scent it with essential oils. This separates out as it sits, which didn’t thrill me, but it doesn’t affect the scrub any. Still, you aren’t going to want to make it too far ahead of when you plan on using it, or give it as a gift. That said, it did a lovely job as a scrub and left C’s skin very soft.

Lemon Vanilla Bath Bombs

C was most excited to make and try this one. She was frustrated to read they have to sit at least 6-8 hours (overnight is even better).

I almost didn’t include it because of the dried lemon rind ingredient. It cost more than I wanted to spend at the store. Instead, I bought three lemons to zest myself, but ended up not having near enough once we dried it in the oven. We estimate we had maybe a 1/2 T compared to the 3-4 T it called for. To make up for it, we chose to add a couple extra drops of E.O.

We haven’t been able to use them in a bath yet, but I can already report that they are sorta a flop. When I tried to get them out of the molds this morning, they crumbled all over. They aren’t holding together at all. 🙁 (UPDATE: Most of the bath bombs actually did pop out ok, and my kids had fun using them in baths. This was a bigger win than expected, but we plan on searching for another recipe we like better.)

Oatmeal Milk Bath

We haven’t had a chance to test this one. It was very simple to mix up, and should store well in an airtight container.

We just used the non-fat that is found at the store, since I couldn’t find “whole fat dried milk”. Whole oatmeal can possibly clog your drain, and that isn’t very relaxing, so I like using ground up oatmeal for this.

My daughter and I had so much fun making these up to test out. If you would like us to do this again with some more recipes, let us know in the comments. Feel free to share your favorite recipes too! I’d be happy to pass those on to my other readers.

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You see people all over social media decrying the value of selfies. Claims of them being a symptom of narcissism, a sign of self involvement, or being a self indulgence are prevalent.  But are they?

What is a selfie?

From the Oxford Dictionary, a selfie is, “A photograph that one has taken of oneself, typically one taken with a smartphone or webcam and shared via social media.”

So, all it is, is a picture you took of yourself. Seems pretty harmless, right? Maybe it’s the purpose of a selfie that people find so objectionable.

What is the purpose of a selfie?

A selfie is all about you. In most selfies, you are the center of attention. You might highlight something else in the background also, or do a joint selfie with friends, but the whole point is that you are in the picture. Hmmm… I still don’t see a problem, but this seems to be what the critics have an issue with.

They don’t really have to have a point. Selfies are a great way to share with the world what is going on in your life that day. They say, hey, I’m here, and I take up space on this planet. That’s a good thing! Posting selfies challenges the idea that you have to justify yourself, and your wish to be seen, to others. You don’t have to justify yourself to anyone though. It is perfectly fine to take notice of yourself and share that with others, if you want.

Selfies are a great confidence booster and a simple, fast way of promoting positive self talk. Having a great hair day? Maybe you are really loving your outfit of the day (OOTD). Perhaps you finally did something you have been meaning to for a long time, and you are really proud? Selfies are a fantastic way to project your awesomeness to the world in a still subtle way. You are allowed to take up space in this world, both online and in real life.

Arguments against selfies

Some people fight back with an indignant “how dare you, who do you think you are??” attitude, and appear in the comments with some awful words. Ignore them, and block them if necessary. There is a deeply ingrained stigma toward having any positivity about yourself. Moving against this stigma makes people uncomfortable, and they try to police your “rebellion” with accusations of narcissism and being superficial.

Claims of selfies being a “cry for attention”  get tossed around too. First off, so what if they are? It’s perfectly ok to want attention! What these accusations really boil down to though, is that many are threatened by girls/women/femmes using selfies as an expression of independence. If we are proud of ourselves, if we are already confident and drawing our confidence from inside, we can’t be controlled as easily. Creating our own positive image of ourselves, rather than depending on the media and other outside opinions for our validation, puts us in a wonderful position of power. That confidence the naysayers criticize is healthy!

This applies only if you are not basing your self-worth and confidence solely on the internet’s opinion of your selfies. That’s not healthy. If you are struggling with this, here is a self care/self love exercise to try. Put on a favorite outfit, try a new hairstyle, or do something else that makes you feel confident. Now take a picture, and write down 5 compliments about your appearance. If you struggle with this, pretend it’s a picture of a stranger, and try again.  Hopefully you wouldn’t insult a stranger, so treat yourself just as well and find some kind things to say about your picture.

Want to know more? I’ve got a couple of links for you. Here you can find 5 Reasons Why You Should Never Apologize For Your Selfies. I love their take on the subject. Also, please check out 35 Artists Who Were Unashamed of Their Selfies. If artists can do it, why can’t we? 🙂

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I’ve been told by my friends that I have awesome “Google-Fu” skills. Maybe that’s why I love looking up things, or maybe I have great skills because I love the search. Either way, I spend a lot of time searching either Google or, more likely, Pinterest, for any and everything I’m interested in learning about. You can check out my Pinterest account for all of my finds, but I thought I’d round up some of my favorite, most useful pins here.

[lwptoc]

Self-Acceptance

First, if you are new here, you might want to check out this post and this one, to see what this “self-acceptance” thing is all about. Now for some great links.

How Radical Acceptance Can Help Your Self-Esteem – This article, by Emily Roberts, is filled with great info such as:

“Radical acceptance doesn’t mean you approve of what happened, you can hate it. It doesn’t mean that once you accept the situation you will become soft or allow other bad things to happen to you. This is fear-based thought. The truth is, you can’t change the situation, but you can change how you want to live your life”

Do yourself a favor and go check out the rest of the post. You will never regret it.

Self Esteem Interactive Online Tool – A note to my readers on their mobile devices, this link is going to work much better on a computer. Bummer. But, it is worth getting your butt to a computer to check it out. This interactive tool from Simply Stepping is such a wonderful idea! I’ve, personally, never seen something like it when it comes to self-esteem/love tools. It really does a great job visually demonstrating how to replace those negative thoughts we all have.

8 Ways That Self Acceptance Will Change Your Life – This post by Christie Inge gives a phenomenal run down on why to mess with this whole self-acceptance thing.

How to Silence Negative Thinking – If you click on the link, there is an article to go with this that you can go read if you want. I really like the part that I pinned though:

This infographic from mindbodygreen is fantastic:

If you want to look into self-acceptance some more, feel free to check out (and follow!) my Self Acceptance Pinterest board.

Self Love

Self-love can feel wrong at first if you are new to it. It isn’t narcissistic or selfish. It is vital. I haven’t written anything solely focused on it yet, but I have some great links to share.

What Self-Love Means – There is so much I love about the Tiny Buddha site, and this article is no exception. Please check it out. Banu Sekendur has many examples listed out, and simply makes understanding this concept as basic as possible. This is an excellent post all around.

Daily Self-Love Checklist – I just love this idea. I used to link to her site, but it doesn’t seem to exist anymore

22 Ways to Love Yourself More – This post by Sharon Martin has terrific ideas for showing yourself some love. I enjoy the included graphic that summarizes it. Do visit the link though since she expands a bit on each idea listed.

3 Ways to Practice Self Love – I adore this woman’s writing style. Please go check out Alessandra Braun’s site and take a look around. She has a free Self-Love Bootcamp that looks just tremendous!

How to Fall In Love With Yourself – I love this post as a “how-to” fall in love with yourself and not another “ways to” show yourself love. Being told how to show yourself love is all well and good, but it’s like being told to hug your pain-in-the-ass sister/brother as a child. This article helps you to find that love for yourself that may be hiding for now. Marelisa Fabrega of Daring To Live Fully does such a wonderful job getting the “how” across to her reader.

How to Feel Unconditional Self-Love – This post has such a beautiful way of describing self-love and how to find and show it. Suzanne Hayn has a remarkable way with words and is a must to check out. Her post may be an especially good one to read on a bad day.

Need more on self-love? I have a Pinterest board full of it.

Self Care

Self-care is extremely important. I have touched on it a few times here and here. My post I wrote about whole self-care expands on the topic. I have found some great links on the subject as well.

First I have this great graphic. The link on Pinterest didn’t go back to the original creator, so I’m not linking back. Instead, here is Pamela Redmond Satran’s site.

10 Scientific Ways to Become Happier – I am a firm “believer” in science. Mention something that doesn’t have peer-reviewed science behind it, and I’m going to give you a raised eyebrow. That is why I was so tickled to see this chart. Each approach included has actual science behind it as to why it works. If you click the link, the article has some links to articles that explain the science.

Quick Solutions for Panic Attacks – This chart has simple, quick ways to try to get a leg up on a panic attack. I love the simplicity, and how user friendly it is. You can easily print it out, cut out the examples, and keep them handy for any panic attack. In addition, Simply Stepping has a post about panic attacks and what to do right on that page. There is also a link to a one on one session for more anxiety support.

6 Ways to Practice Self-Care When Rest is Out of Reach – This is the perfect post for anyone who thinks they are just too busy to take care of themselves. Brittany L. Bergman gets it and tells you why you are wrong.

Seven Self-Care Strategies for Those Struggling – This is a beautifully written post about the less fun parts of self-care. The author of The Span of My Hips covers the topic with understanding and wonderful insight. Don’t miss out on their knowledge.

If you want more on Self-Care, visit my Pinterest board. I also have one filled with DIY self-care products.

A More Fulfilling Life

Sometimes you find you need more to your life, a purpose that is more than just living day-to-day. I looked for mine for a long time, and I know it is a terrible feeling to live with. So, I have compiled a variety of pins with ideas on how to find your purpose or lead a more fulfilling life in general.

9 Ways to Figure Out What You’re “Meant” To Do – Brianna Wiest, an author at Bustle has nine great questions for you to ask yourself. Once you get to the end of the list, there is an excellent chance you will have an idea of what you are “meant” to do in this world. At the very least, you should learn more about yourself, and it is always nice to have more insight into your inner workings.

Secrets To Creating A Life You Love – Please do yourself a favor, and see what Karen from One Salty Kiss has written on the subject of not just loving your life, but creating a life you love. She covers the topic in a fantastic fashion. Don’t miss out.

Any of these three work for you? Need different ideas, or just want to do more reading on this subject? I have plenty more on my Pinterest board.

That’s all I have this time. Let me know if you liked this idea, and I’ll be sure to make up another resource roundup in the future. Remember, I have a lot more pinned over at Pinterest, and I’ll be adding more all of the time.

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